“These times are hard, but I won't walk away
jaded, darker, different. I feel. I cry to heal.
If you saw me in those moments, maybe you'd think
I was a mess. But I don't call it a mess.
I call it strength.
Real strength isn't about building walls.
Real strength is about staying open, no matter what.
It's about taking life - with all the pleasures that fade and all the pain that sticks around for too long - and not shutting down, not closing down, not building up those walls.
Resilience isn't hard, impenetrable, iron.
Resilience is flexible, soft, warm.
Stay strong. The real kind of strong.
Don't let your automatic mind reflexes make you jump away from pain and towards pleasure. Make choices. See clearly.
And never, ever, stop feeling.
Don't go numb.
The world, even with all its horror,
is too beautiful to miss.
No matter how much you cry, the tears will dry.
No matter how many nightmares, flashbacks, visions, or terrors you endure, they will pass.
To weather these in order to find your true self and the happiness you deserve, that is not a risk.
To waste the time you have in this body, never showing your soul to yourself or anyone else, living in fearful misery – that is really the most dangerous thing you can do.”
From Vironika Tugaleva, in The Shades of Missing you